The Final Reflection

This reflection is not going to be good enough for a final reflection for this class but as I sit here, sick, tired and recently returned from an emergency trip to Minnesota over there weekend where I was treated to driving snow and frigid temperatures, my wont is to just get it out the door and maybe make something respectable of it at a later time.

I remember when I first knew that I was going to be taking World Politics. I figured that I would walk in and immediately astound everyone with my brilliance and would henceforth go to class surrounded by swimsuit models and wearing a fur coat and a purple fedora. However, as I soon found out that was not the case. And as it would be repeatedly shown to me, I am not that smart of a student of IR. Which was fine, if emasculating. I certainly have become a better one with time (though, as PTJ would be quick to point out, "better" does not mean "good").

One interesting phenomena is that I have become more conservative and more realist. PTJ even said on my essay that I sounded awfully realist for a self proclaimed liberal and that may be (though I do admit to tossing the rules out a bit when the annihilation of humanity is on the line). I don't know if that is a bad thing or not, or even if it is something to which a "good" or "bad" label (whatever those mean anyway) can be ascribed. When my brother went to college he came back with his "coexist" posters and a big beard and I have none of those. Though, I admit to being jealous of the beard.

College has been many things to me but it hasn't been the huge transformational experience I thought it would be. AU is certainly not at fault for that (though I do occasionally wonder what Fordham, GW or the U would be like now). This will sound awfully narcissistic [even] for me but I think it's because I came to college a little more mature than my brother and others. Maybe "mature" is not the right word but with a more developed sense of purpose. I know what I want to do, I've known it since Freshman year in high school. Maybe that will change, and maybe then college will be the huge trans-formative event I've heard about but maybe not. I'm only a first semester freshman, there remains a lot to be seen, a lot [LOT] to be learned and a lot to discover. Only time will tell.